A Frank Review of "The Girl's Guide to Depravity" Season 1 (2012)

The Short Version? Sex. City Optional.
What Is It? Comedy-Drama
Who Is In It? Nobody you know.
Should I See It? Maybe.



"Max After Dark" is the Cinemax cable channel's way of letting viewers know that they've stepped out of the movie zone and into notorious "Skinemax" territory. Where cable channels often slum for viewers with softcore porn after hours, Cinemax has the dedication to commission original programming for this block. The Girl's Guide to Depravity, based on the blog of Heather Rutman, chronicles the adventures of a pair of single twenty-somethings trying to get their fuck on in between monogamous relationships without getting the short end of any given stick. Lizzie (Sally Golan) is a hard ass attorney, while Jason (Jesse Liebman) is her much abused fellow lawyer. Comparatively meek best friend Samantha (Rebecca Blumhagen) works in public relations or advertising or something, and has a catty relationship with her relatively chaste office mate Kate (Margaret Keane Williams) and loudly sextastic next door neighbor Kaylie (Riley Steele.) Queer barkeep Tyler (Joe Komara) slings advice with the drinks as the girls spill woe and prowl for pole. Let's see how that pans out on an episode-by-episode basis...

1. "The Break-Up Rule": Cute start. The credit sequence is lightly animated with a decent tune that I wasn't sick of after numerous listens, followed by a dialogue-free opening section involving another nice tune and lots of quirky digital effects highlighting various "rules." Perfume bottles arranged by the type of man they're meant to attract, onscreen text messages, and so on. The acting is low-end TV fare, but relatively high end for a weekly softcore comedy. Whoever cast the deceptively legal Rebecca Blumhagen is a sexual deviant, and bless their hearts/nether regions. Sally Golan's hiring is more typical along the lines of this sort of show, and her character is overly bitchy. I would hope the "rules" were intended to parody dogmatic self-help bestsellers by applying them to opportunistic promiscuity. As employed here, rather than coming off as sexually empowered, the "girls" quote rules so often and with such fervor as to seem like mindless disciples. It makes Samantha come across as a weakling and Lizzie deluded. The misandry is also off-putting, as decent enough if underwhelming guys are treated like lepers, while abusive himbos are adored. The plot is too involved to be this shabby and misguided, especially as it cuts into Samantha's severely truncated sex scene, and leaves Lizzie's feeling tacked on.
   
   
2. The Last Woman Standing Rule: I'm sure awkward was what they were shooting for, but funny would have been a nice inclusion to a scene involving an attempt to start a relationship. The plot where a lawyer goes undercover to try to trap an employer in a sexual harassment suit is ridiculous. There's also the part where two hot and fairly indiscriminate girls struggle to get laid, because that happens, right? Lizzie's sex scene is best measured in seconds. There was a nice foley gag during a barroom competition. To spoil the ending, not only doesn't Samantha get a satisfying sex scene, but her drunk-stick bedside manner leaves a lot to be desired (entendre intended.)
   
   
3. The Puma Rule: Jesse Liebman's Jason has been eating shit for 2¼ episodes, so it was nice to see things turn around for him for a little bit. There were two decent sex scenes in this ep, but none for Samantha, I'm afraid. Still, this one shows marked improvement. Lizzie's aggressiveness delivers comedically, and I'm finding that I dig her nose.
   
   
4. The Vibrator Rule: The acting in general is still porn quality, but Blumhagen and Golan are getting further into their characters with each episode. I figured Jason was introduced as the nice guy who would eventually man up for one of the girls, but a new sad sack named Kate getting introduced into Samantha's workplace indicates they'll eventually get paired off. For a series with a four million budget spread across fourteen episodes, the music is surprisingly good. There's a nifty little techno tune this time that helps sell the vacuous whorishness of Riley Steele's Kaylie character. It's nice to see that Samantha can bring the bitch when needed, and I guess Kate will carry the innocent quasi-virginal torch. I felt bad for the wine guy, but sometimes being bold leaves a body cold.
   
   
5. The Bitch Rule: Okay, this was an annoying episode. The worst rules are spoken as absolutes, and I'd absolutely sneer at these bitches over their shenanigans. Also, Samantha can't pull it off at all, and I guess these ladies are unfamiliar with the concept of the hate fuck. Worth noting: thirteen minutes until the first sex scene, and a later one was more creepy than funny.
   
   
6. The Magic Pussy Rule: After getting Lizzie's best sex scene so far out of the way immediately following the credits, the funniest episode so far emerges. Too bad weak drama fills the closing minutes, plus Justine Joli gets wasted in a cameo, but this was still a good one.
   
   
7. The Fuck Buddy Rule: I'm glad Teef McLottanose got shown the door, as the prospect of Samantha masturbating is more enticing than further frustrating encounters with that guy. Besides, everyone knows Milla Jovovich is the hottest action star (not counting weirdos who favor that ice queen Fetish Posh Spice from the Underworld movies.) The Matrix gag was cute for half a minute, but everything about this episode dragged on too long, and most every other bit missed.
   
   
8. The Cheating Rule: That shit where they recycled scenes from the first episode? Fuck that shit. I understand why they did it, but this whole episode was too stupid to justify it. Someone watched a decent dark comedy, tried to imitate it, but lacked any aptitude for it. The sex wasn't great, either.
   
   
9. The Bi-Guy Rule: There wasn't a lot of sex, because it was too busy being a really fun episode with elevated acting game and a story to tell. I regret not keeping up with the individual screenwriters, as IMDb doesn't give credits, and some of these folks are clearly better than others. For you homophones out there, the action on display is strictly straight.
   
   
10. The Unavailable Rule: They finally introduced Sienne (Whitney Kimball Long,) and like "her" stupid rules, I pretty much dislike her on sight. Depressing and annoying is not a great combination. Lizzie has a nice sex scene, but Jason's (yes, Jason's) only works if you're into Jason. I had to multitask reading some blogs to get through this weak romcom shit.
    
    
11. The Pill Rule: Lizzie gets things off right by riding Dirty Hot Guy with all her might. Elizabeth Carlisle takes Clarityn, in case you're also OCD about reading stuff off bottles on a screen. Hannah Fierman's Pill Pusher Patty is probably the most interesting character on the show to date, for whatever that's worth. Man, this episode was heavy, relative to a series that I don't think is built to carry the weight. Go back to making fun of tiny dicks.
    
    
12. The Getting His Attention Rule: Oh shit, stark slow piano playing. That's like the Incredible Hulk closing theme of softcore drama. Your mournful genitals are getting left on an empty highway. There appears to be a strict no-homo rule on this show, so a trip to jail is more Mayberry R.F.D. than Chained Heat, although I still hate Sienna too much to have enjoyed it anyway. Better than the depths of the last ep, but still undermines the premise of the series with (blech) traditional values. Kate does get her fuck on as a result, though. Also, the music over the last several episodes has been very nice, and it was solid to begin with.
    
    
13. The Revenge Rule: So yeah, they totally gave up on comedy and went right into romantic drama for the last quarter of the season. I'm glad they got away from the dogma, but if the humor doesn't come back in a big way, there aren't enough strong sex scenes to warrant TiVo speed viewing. They made sure to tie up everything with one long loose thread in the event of a season two. They even worked Riley Steele and Pill Pusher Patty in, though not for the five minute lackadaisical lovemaking montage. It ends on a meh note as a result.
    
    

What have we learned from the first season of Rules? That by the end, the cast really showed their chops in the acting and fucking department, but were hampered by spotty writing and a lack of conviction in the softcore department. Aspirations mean the series has excellent music and looks great, with solid direction. However, the drama is a buzzkill, the comedy often isn't up to snuff, and the mediocre attempts at both crowd out the nudity meant to put bare asses in seats. The show is ultimately charming, coasting on charisma and chemistry where it lags in T&A funny. Hopefully, the creators will reevaluate their priorities if the show continues, because they get plenty enough right to earn another look.

A Frank Review of "Maid in Sweden" (1971)

The Short Version? How you gonna keep 'em down on the farm once they've seen... Stockholm?
What Is It? Softcore Bore
Who Is In It? One-Eye; additional Swedes
Should I See It? No.

"Maid in Sweden tells the story of Inga, a 16-year-old Swedish girl who leaves her rural home to spend a weekend in the Swedish capital. An innocent with no experience, but with prodigious physical attributes, she has a series of romantic adventures as she throws off the frustrations of her small-town environment"

Twenty-one year old Christina Lindberg plays the repressed Swedish schoolgirl with overbearing parents who springs a visit on her independent sister Greta (Monica Ekman.) This pisses off Greta's live-in boyfriend Carsten (Krister Ekman.) Inga unintentionally shows a bit of tit on the train over, then spends the day with her sister. Inga, Greta and Carsten all hit the hash hukkah, then the deeply stoned older sister confesses that she's living in sin. Inga agrees to keep her mouth shut, then it's off to bed. Inga dreams of a couple screwing around in a hall, then two near rapes of her person, one sapphic. None of this is particularly titillating or believable. Inga finally wakes up to spy on her sister having completely unconvincing hippy freakout sex with her boyfriend while their static pelvises are in separate zip codes. Inga eventually returns to her room to motion in the general vicinity of her own genitalia.

The trio go ice skating, because what the fuck else do you do in Sweden besides get high, get laid, and attempt suicide-- all somehow involving god damned snow, hot chocolate, and the Aryan ideal. Carsten acts like a dick, giving Inga a hard time about being a goody-two-shoes. Carsten is convinced by Greta to hook Inga up with a date with his rapist buddy. Next morning, everything's hunky-dory, and we're off on another montage with a softcore porn Eurofag pop vocal score, with bonus bicycling. We're nearly an hour in, and that's all we have to show for it? Heil the hell long is this thing, anyway?

Nighttime is the right time for simulated "artistically" lit cunnilingus where you can't see anything. Sis is worried. Country rock montage walk through the woods. Sneaking back in. Dick boyfriend makes Inga call sis at work to say she's okay. Inga takes a shower. Inga sneaks out on her last night in town to fuck the date rapist one more time. She's a meaty old school Playmate and he's lean and firm for a dude, making for some awkward pauses as the viewer tries to figure out whose ass they're checking out. Inga sneaks back in. Dick boyfriend brings dick to bear against Inga, who accommodates all too quickly. Big sis busts them both in the bathtub. Inga is sent packing.

As I mentioned, there's some artistic posturing, but when the cameraman casts a shadow, craft goes out the window. The acting is bad in that way you only get when you force an entire cast of amateurs to read dialogue in a non-native tongue. Then again, maybe it was all ad-libbed from an outline, because the script couldn't have been longer that a few double-spaced pages. Even the sex scenes are incompetent, the bare minimum standard for this sort of drivel. Only the most die hard fans of Christina Lindberg's anatomy should get near this thing.

1995 Korean Emmanuelle Television Series Ad

Sylvia Kristel Emmanuelle Custom Barbie Doll

Here's one of those outrageous things you only stumble across through hard core web surfing: a custom made Emmanuelle doll as modeled by Sylvia Kristel for one of the 1974 film's best remembered movie posters. Juan Albuerne, Asun Merino and Vince Tibavido obviously did an incredible job with their recreation. Kristel was of course topless for the original image (and about half of the flick,) so Albuerne had to sculpt nipples (censored here) with Milliput paste. You can see the full size, uncensored images here, or be amazed by the complete catalog at JUAN ALBUERNE'S MOVIE STARS site. They're almost all female, and many are impossibly spot on. I particularly liked Diana Ross, Penelope Cruz, Whoopi Goldberg and especially Brandy.

Understanding "Emanuelle in America" (Part 1)

Make no mistake, the primary goal of Emanuelle in America is to be sleazy soft/hardcore porn, depending on which cut you see. However, I strongly suspect historically awful filmmaker Aristide Massaccesi, more widely maligned as Joe D'Amato, was actually trying to mingle art and social commentary into his typical genre-goulash. Right off the bat, these are hedonistic Italians setting their gonzo romp in the puritanical United States. Besides, D'Amato had three writers on this instead of hacking out something on his own, so he must have taken it seriously. Indulge me...

The very first image is of the Roosevelt Island sky tram, then of Emanuelle inside, taking in the view like an angel surveying Sodom as she descends into the mire. The name Emanuelle is a feminine derivative of the Biblical Emmanuel, meaning "God is with us."Emanuelle as always represents the sexually empowered female, yet she next strides uneasily past the neon lights of a peep show. Emanuelle walks the streets of New York City in a stylish and stark white suit. Perhaps the white represents her unadulterated, enlightened being, and the cut her sophistication. She is juxtaposed against the gray, grimy city of hustlers and eccentrics. Emanuelle struts down a busy street, surrounded by skyscrapers like randy cocks on the boulevard.

Scenes are intercut of Emanuelle in her achromatic studio, taking photographs of beautiful, liberated nude women astride a black motorcycle. The decor is provocative, artistically interpreting the female form through fruits and ornamentation. Emanuelle is the beholder, capturing the world through her lens, and adjusting the lighting as needed. When the film finally settles in at the studio, we see it through the eyes of a voyeur glancing in on Emanuelle's Heaven, but our line of sight is entombed by an ebon border.

We next see a fellow named Howie looking at himself in the mirror, then bidding the girls adieu. How is Howie? He seems fine, and represents a healthy, good-natured homosexuality. However, even though Howie clearly has a place in Emanuelle Heaven, that role must be denied in the eyes of America, and he vanishes.

Emanuelle talks with the models as they dress, balancing their obvious objectification with their Earthly reality. One model is named Jane, a feminine derivative of the most common male name in Christiandom, John. Jane mentions her John, or rather Tony, her new intellectual boyfriend who refuses to have sex. Everyone then exits Emanuelle Heaven for the city, and our heroine gets into her blue car, representing calm emotions, the sky, and even the Virgin Mary. She is almost immediately thereafter held at gunpoint by Jane's boyfriend. This is Tony, an abbreviated version of Anthony, as in the Catholic saint who founded Christian monasticism. Tony is a chaste religious nut who believes killing Emanuelle will somehow strike back against the pervasive and perverse sexuality of the 1970s. Like many Americans, Tony believes his conviction will prove his righteousness to the entire world, regardless of his means. Tony barely acknowledges the rule of law, assuming he will be judged innocent of any crime through the truth in his actions.

Emanuelle tries to be reasonable, offering her money and car, to no avail. While the beau rants, Emanuelle plays with his mind and his tallywacker, until he doesn't know whether he's coming or going. The entire time, Emanuelle is behind the wheel of a big American automobile, symbol of the emancipation of Yankees from the farm and the flock to urban life. The gunman leaves his pistol behind as he runs from the sexual responsibility Emanuelle and the car represent. Through her worldliness, Emanuelle has taken Tony's surrogate penis, never fired, and initiated him in the use of his actual member. It's worth noting that "Anthony" was once routinely confused with the Greek word for "flower."

Besides representing America, Tony also raises the subtext of Emanuelle's symbolic nature to text and offers his interpretation for dispute amongst the audience. Tony informs the viewer that Emanuelle is not just a lusty heroine, but an icon for the modern sexuality he views as evil. At the same time, Tony desires Janet, offering Emanuelle a look at a nude magazine cover of his ladylove rather than a wholesome wallet snapshot. Despite Tony's assertions of his piety, it was he who hopped into Emanuelle's "back seat," shoved his "pistol" in her face, and wasn't satisfied until Emanuelle broke down his facade. Tony represents the hypocrisy of the religious right, as he flaunts his second amendment rights and lusts in his heart. Tony's jacket is beige, representing his generic, common, Caucasian being. However, under the jacket is a black and white checkered shirt, revealing the struggle with polarity that grips his chest. Emanuelle is ethnic and exotic, with a worldview foreign to his own. She is draped in the whiteness Tony seeks, while his own hand clutches a black gun. While Tony is erratic and aggressive, Emanuelle is calm, and gently explains her and Jane's world like a priestess to a hesitant convert. Further, Tony recalls a memory associating his mother with an unnamed sexual act. This by extension associates his maternal love with Jane and Emanuelle, projecting his Oedipal confusion onto them. In the end, after receiving Emanuelle's kiss to his nether regions, Tony finally connects his emotions to his libido. He runs away until he can resolve this realization in his mind, but shouts "I love it!" Tony flowers, and turns his anger into a sexual love for women.

Emanuelle brings the discarded "pistol" to the favored man in her life, Bill. This can be explained through the entomology of Bill's name. Derived from the Germanic "Wilhelm," the first syllable means "will" or "desire," the second "helmet," or "protection." Clearly Bill is insecure in his masculinity, and desires a surrogate cock of his own with which to protect Emanuelle. This is represented visually by Bill's awkwardly receded hairline, his "helmet" proving inadequate. Emanuelle has no penis envy, and encourages Bill to work out his own through the "pistol" as he sees fit, mostly through posturing. Emanuelle wanders their apartment topless, and expresses her disgust at the experience, offering Bill guidance to accept his own "helmet." Yet, she recognizes Bill's developmental issues, and through her expressed forgiveness and best wishes for Tony unobtrusively extends the same grace to Bill.

Bill wears blue jeans and a shirt buttoned down to his navel, mimicking Emanuelle car and fashion while betraying his crude Western understanding. His entire apartment is colored green, alluding both to the natural life in him that attracts Emanuelle, as well as his childish naivete and jealousy. There are books and artwork along the walls, but these are affectations. More prominent is his bar, displaying the type of fixation with alcohol found in adolescents, confusing the trappings of maturity with its actualization. This is made all the more obvious when his coffee table, which looks and functions like a pack of Marlboro cigarettes, proves to also function as a bar. It is his racing car-shaped bed, and the dazzle of consumer culture.

Emanuelle laments her relationship with Bill, an endless cycle of trysts and underdeveloped affection. Bill makes mention of marriage, but Emanuelle makes jest of it, salvaging his self-esteem with platitudes about personal freedom while recognizing her absence of desire to commit matrimony with a man-child. Bill jokingly threatens to shoot himself in the head, an unsubtle reference to masturbation should Emanuelle refuse him. Emanuelle accepts the circumstances of her relationship with Bill, and submits to his sexual needs, but not without first asserting herself as a responsible adult by rescheduling an appointment on the phone. Bill is giddily enthusiastic, while Emanuelle, even nude, is matronly.

Emanuelle in America Theme (Instrumental Version)

NOT SAFE FOR WORK -- NUDITY

Includes credit sequence and other scenes from the film, accompanied by the music of Nico Fidinco... and full frontal.

Emanuelle in America (Epilogue, 1977)

Character Name: Emanuelle Rogers
Actress: Laura Gemser
Actual Movie Title: Emanuelle in America
Known Aliases: "Brutal Nights," "Black Emanuelle en Amérique"
Country of Origin: Italy
Character Nationality: U.S.A.
Occupation: Photographer (news, nudes)
Zodiac Sign: Gemini
Married: No.
Locales: New York City, Venice, Washington D.C., Caribbean
Release Date: January 5, 1977 (Italy)
Director: Joe D'Amato
DVD: Emanuelle In America (1976)
Stats: Third Black Emanuelle, 2nd with Laura Gemser

Story: On a tropical getaway, Emanuelle finished telling Bill (Riccardo Salvino) "...and then I just slammed the door and walked away from him." The couple laughed, and Bill proclaimed "Goodbye editor!" Emanuelle continued, saying farewell to her camera equipment and so on. Emanuelle joked about casting off her career and going native. "The people are beautiful and healthy here. We'll live like them and become even more beautiful and more healthy!" Bill discussed building a bamboo cabin, while Emanuelle thought she was the happiest girl in a world, but couldn't remember which. "...and I'm gonna forget everything else that isn't necessary in this paradise-- like words, success, poli--"

Emanuelle's escapist ramble was interrupted by her being caught in a net trap laid by villagers and left dangling from a tree. Emanuelle cried for help and release, but Bill smiled and looked on as she was carried off by tribesmen. The ladies of the village then seized Bill and drug him off.

In a hut, Emanuelle had lotions rubbed into her nude body by women of the village, as she rested regally on her knees. Bill, now wearing only a sarong and drinking, spoke to Emanuelle from outside. "Is everything alright, darling?" Emanuelle broke her poise, calling out with concern, "Bill! What's going on?!? Come in here!" Bill lazily replied, "I can't, it's forbidden. They're sort of-- ah-- preparing you..." Bill laughed, "I think I sold you... for a splendid collection of tropical shells and for a good cup of, ah, local beer. Good beer. Very very alcoholic."

Emanuelle was dressed and led to a tribal gathering. She was set beside the chief, who claimed her as his wife. Bill continued to egg Emanuelle on, telling her "his majesty" was a jealous husband who wished her to bear children and for Bill to leave the island after the upcoming celebration. Instruments were played and dancing began, while others knelt down and prayed. His Majesty claimed that thirty-two of those present were his children. Other wives needed him, so his majesty left the festivities in Emanuelle's hands. Emanuelle smiled and looked on, while Bill drunkenly snickered and bobbed his head about, until both danced.

Later, Emanuelle and Bill woke up in bed together, hearing orders shouted from outside their hut. A film crew was outside: costuming the natives, practicing dance choreography, setting up lights and so on. Bill determined that paradise was lost, and felt the pair should get out of there, before someone tried to cast them as extras. As the haunting sounds of Armonium and Nico Fidenco played, Bill and Emanuelle ran barefoot along the coast, the sun setting in the distance.

Emanuelle in America (Part 6, 1977)

Character Name: Emanuelle Rogers
Actress: Laura Gemser
Actual Movie Title: Emanuelle in America
Known Aliases: "Brutal Nights," "Black Emanuelle en Amérique"
Country of Origin: Italy
Character Nationality: U.S.A.
Character Age:
Occupation: Photographer (news, nudes)
Zodiac Sign: Gemini
Religion:
Married:
Locales: New York
Release Date: January 5, 1977 (Italy)
Director: Joe D'Amato
DVD: Emanuelle In America (1976)
Stats: Third Black Emanuelle, 2nd with Laura Gemser

Story: Emanuelle was taken to her publisher's offices by taxi (370 ??? St?,) where she began doing research. Her newspaper can be seen, called the Courier (perhaps the Queens Courier?) At the presses, she read about a missing prostitute believed to have fallen to a possible revenge killing. "Like hell. Hey Frankie! I'm convinced I saw her in that film." Emanuelle's editor asked if she was sure the seeming snuff film wasn't really just a porno, but like Italian authorities when this flick came out, she was sure "You can't get that kind of simulation from a professional actor." Frankie tried to warn her off such a dangerous story, but Emanuelle smiled confidently. "After all the things that have happened to me, I've always managed to come back." Frankie continued, "Hold on. As your friend, let me give you some good advise: Don't have anything to do with this story unless you're sure it's safe. As your editor, I can give you a name and an address: A guy called Ronnie. He lives down at the East River on a fishing boat. He's an ex-cop who got kicked out of the police department for accepting bribes and God knows what else. He knows everything there is to know about everybody, and he doesn't give interviews, so you'll have to have something to offer him. Alright?"

At the docks, Ronnie explained that not even the police could handle the snuff ring, as its backers were too powerful. Ronnie didn't have names, and was hot to bet on a horse. Emanuelle offered a 20-to-1 yield without even having to placing a bet, so Ronnie directed her to Washington, D.C...

In the capitol, Emanuelle began trailing a senator (Roger Browne,) spying on him with his family of a wife and three kids. Eventually, she "accidentally" dropped her drink off a lunch tray at a restaurant onto the Senator. Asking for a way to make up for her clumsiness, the Senator suggested Emanuelle be his company at his table. The pair hit it off, and continued their conversation into a park. Emanuelle buttered the Senator up, speaking of how attractive, intelligent, charming, patriotic and responsible he was. This prompted the Senator to launch into a speech. "Everybody in this country is so concerned about what the world thinks of us, when actually we should feel great pride in what we've achieved-- for this is the greatest country in the world... What about the young people of today? Their heads are stuffed full of crazy ideas and a lot of nonsense. What we really need right now is another war. Then they'd come back with their heads screwed on straight... and the ones that don't come back will have given some meaning to their lives-- sacrificing themselves for their country... It's a fantastic country."

Emanuelle kept up the sweet talk, claiming to be on vacation, so this important man jokingly demanded she follow him to his place to change the coat she ruined. One scene later, and Emanuelle was stripping naked in his bedroom. The make-out session commenced, where Emanuelle pressed for the Senator to produce something "far out-- forbidden." The Senator cued up a concealed reel-to-reel, which projected a grainy black and white ménage à trois. Emanuelle played cold fish, until she convinced the Senator to produce something "really strong." Careful what you wish for...

A topless girl with short, dark, curly hair and a bloody slash across her breast was punched. Dropping to her knees, she was forced to take her attacker's prick in hand. Cut to the girl being sodomized while bound over a rack. Cut to three girls with their hands tied with rope behind them, their backs flogged by soldiers. Cut to a brunette woman in a choke hold, her legs lifted and spread apart by another two militants, and a long, moored, barbed wooden phallus forced inside her. Cut to three women writhing on the floor as their clothes are forcefully pulled off. Cut to the brunette's gored vagina. Cut to a woman on the floor, hands behind her back. Blood flows from her nose, mouth, and torso as she's flogged. Pan to another woman's flayed back. Pan to another woman covered in blood as she's lifted from her bonds and flogged. A man's hand reaches for a large black metal hook on a line. Pan to a brutalized woman whose forehead, wrists, waist and knees are restrained by metal brackets, as the hook is inserted into her vagina. Cut to a man turning a crank to tighten the line. A soldier looks on while swigging a bottle, while another heats a rod in a brazier. Pan to a limp woman bound to a St. Andrew's cross molested by a sweaty militant. Pan to the sodomized woman, her arms increasing wrenched by another soldier cranking the rack. She is bound at the shoulders and small of back by metal rails. Cut to woman on barbed phallus hemorrhaging and slumping lifeless.

Emanuelle accepts the Senator's mouth against her body, as she focuses on taking covert snapshots of the film with her necklace camera. The sound of celluloid slapping signals the end of the ordeal. The Senator did not appear to have removed his short robe for fornication, but still declared the experience fantastic. Emanuelle agreed, claiming to have been turned-on by the awful images. Emanuelle "confessed" to being a closet masochist who fantasized about having such a cruel experience in real life. "It's the raw horror of it that excites me... Who knows where, or when, a normal middle class American girl like me could see things like that?" The Senator took this as consent to drug her drink. The Senator finally stripped and laid Emanuelle down, just as her eyes widened in confusion...

Visions of a private airplane trip with the Senator filled Emanuelle's mind. She saw herself in the back of a military jeep in the jungle, riding with the Senator and soldiers to a secluded base. Inside a house, the couple were led by a trooper to a wall with a shuttered viewing window. Once opened, what Emanuelle sees appears as another movie...

Film of various nude and beaten women led by a military troop. Cut to a large bestial phallus-funnel being forced into a girl's mouth. Cut to woman shackled to table with a broom handle in her bloodied vagina. Cut to steaming hot/molten liquid being poured into the funnel and down the victim's throat. Cut to near-dead woman bent over a table, the ribs of her flayed back exposed. Two soldiers hoist her up and place a bit in her mouth. She is then sodomized by one soldier as another tugs at her reins. Cut to woman on St. Andrew's cross, covered in blood, as her nipples are cut off in turn with a dull machete. Cut to flayed/sodomized woman as the force of the reins tears her cheeks open.

As Emanuelle and the Senator watched, he positioned himself behind her; lifting her skirt and tugging off her underwear. Emanuelle was in a drug-addled haze, transfixed by the deprivations playing out before her as she's taken from behind.

Emanuelle awoke from her nightmare, back in the Senator's bed. He explained that her vision was the result of a little powdered LSD, which Emanuelle had never tried before. Emanuelle claimed to be pleased by the trip, and promised she'd visit the Senator again whenever he wanted. The Senator kissed Emanuelle, saying, "We'll pick up tomorrow where we left off today."

Emanuelle returned to the New York offices of her employers, believing she had wasted her time on an acid trip. Perhaps that could explain why she now called her editor "Freddie." Regardless, the editor had an envelop full of "magnificent" developed black and white photos from Emanuelle's "dream." Emanuelle was pleased that her experienced happened after all, while her editor felt, "It's enough to make you puke. I'm not surprised you remember it as a nightmare. You're lucky you woke up." Emanuelle thought she had the scoop of the century, but her editor thought she should forget the whole thing. He explained that for the first time since he'd been with the paper, its owner had commanded him to kill a story. "No two ways about it, but don't worry... I'll put it in the archives, and at the first opportunity that comes along, I'll publish it. Alright?"

Emanuelle was livid. "Hey, wait a minute! I don't give a damn about the archives! Don't you realize I could have been killed? If we don't condemn these atrocities publicly, other girls are gonna get dragged into it, and we'll become accomplices to the whole filthy business!" Freddie wasn't any happier than Emanuelle, but even as she continued to plead with him, the matter was closed. Furious, Emanuelle proclaimed she wanted to blow the whole paper up, owners and editor included! Freddie told her to take a few days to calm down, but Emanuelle said she would take a week... month... year... five years... ten... "All my life if I feel like it!"

...to be concluded...

Emanuelle in America (Part 5, 1977)

Character Name: Emanuelle Rogers
Actress: Laura Gemser
Actual Movie Title: Emanuelle in America
Known Aliases: "Brutal Nights," "Black Emanuelle en Amérique"
Country of Origin: Italy
Character Nationality: U.S.A.
Character Age:
Occupation: Photographer (news, nudes)
Zodiac Sign: Gemini
Religion:
Married:
Locales: New York
Release Date: January 5, 1977 (Italy)
Director: Joe D'Amato
DVD: Emanuelle In America (1976)
Stats: Third Black Emanuelle, 2nd with Laura Gemser

Story: Driving her car through New York to a jazzy soundtrack, Emanuelle makes her way to another nude shoot with Janet (Stefania Nocilli.) Emanuelle asked about Tony (Giulio Bianchi.) "He's terrific. Believe it or not, we were married two weeks ago... He's really changed. That's all he thinks about... He's so horny, the only rest I get is when I'm working." Emanuelle chirped "Maybe he's taking vitamins." The phone rang, and Emanuelle dismissed Janet to talk to Bill (Riccardo Salvino,) working with the Queen out of Buckingham Palace. Painfully lonely, Emanuelle demanded phone sex from her obliging lover.

The next day, a disguised Emanuelle was being driven to the pleasure island she'd learned about at the orgy. Her driver couldn't stop staring, and he explained that he had been born there, and saw his share of ladies come and go. "I drive t'the Chez Fabienne Singles Club every day. Have done for years. The ladies I bring out are filthy rich-- ugly as hell, so I think they ought to pay. But lady, that stuff's not for you, cause you're first class material." Emanuelle said that she was just curious about a new experience, steadily working her secret necklace camera.

At the club, Emanuelle introduced herself as "Laura Rogers" to Diana Smith (Maria Piera Regoli,) who ran the club. "Later this afternoon, you'll be able to choose your partner. Would you like something to drink? Go ahead-- I don't drink myself." Emanuelle was more interested in her penis-shaped cookies. "Oh no, not one of those. They're made with some rather special ingredients that can have quite an effect on you. I'd wait until later." Smith required a half payment down, which would cover any "accessories" that might be required. The price was steep, but between the discretion, security, and opportunities available, Smith felt it was justified.

Emanuelle soon found herself in a lounge amongst other guests, inspecting a gaggle of well-toned, nearly nude hunks wearing numbered collars. Cookies were eaten, covert photos were taken, and couples paired off into seclusion. Emanuelle overheard role-playing coming from a small hut outside, revolving around a Tarzan (Rick 'Ercolino' Martino) "eating" Jane (Marina Hedman.) Well, she ate him right back, performing fellatio to climax in the XXX European cut, along with brief penetration. Emanuelle took her shots, then progressed to another woman threading flowers through the bush of an uncircumcised male. Emanuelle then reentered the hotel, where she furthered her investigation by peeking into rooms. The first offered an older blond woman, a strapping black man, his white partner, hand jobs, finger bangs, snake tongue, dual oral, doggy style, and ejaculations. Emanuelle next spied a Sam Elliot lookalike "Zorro" and his fire-crotched cougar (Renate Kasché) on the stairs, she masturbating while he cracked a whip off-screen.

Still not satisfied, Emanuelle took advantage of a key left in a door to open it a crack and peer inside. Her first sight was a reel-to-reel film projector, then a platinum blond enjoying the movie and a man's mouth on a bed alongside. Emanuelle's eyes followed toward the screen, where she was disturbed by the sight of a screaming nude black woman bound with rope to a St. Andrews cross while being threatened with a blowtorch. Cut to uniformed militants shackling a bloodied woman to a table. Cut again to a woman with a pipe shoved down her throat, blood spurting out, her wrists tied behind her back and hair pulled. Emanuelle paused, seemingly on the verge of tears. A black militant on screen pushed a woman to the ground. Cut to mostly nude men in army caps raping a variety of women. One has an enormous phallus, which he forces into the bloody vagina of a victim, her legs covered in scratches. Several men hold her down, one choking her about the throat with his hands. Cut to the girl who had taken a pipe in her mouth, dazed as a soldier cocked a gun in her face. Through wide-eyed horror, Emanuelle returned to shooting pictures. A branding iron was pressed into the flesh of a girl's back. Emanuelle heard the moans of the couple, taking pleasure in this atrocity, and closed the door silently.

Emanuelle returned to her room to remove the camera from her necklace. Two burly hotel attendants rushed to her door, so she hid in a closet. Emanuelle at first seemed concerned, then smiled before her door was broken down. The necklace was found empty, and Emanuelle was escorted to Diana Smith. It seemed one of her "stallions" read Emanuelle's magazine all the time, so Smith deduced the real reason for her visit. Smith refused to return Emanuelle's clothes and other belongings until the roll of film she'd been spotted taking was handed over. Murderer wasn't on the table, as Smith was certain it wouldn't come to that. As this was a matter of potentially compromised reputations, Smith seemed inclined more toward having Emanuelle arrested on trumped up charges.

Emanuelle didn't seem worried, as she sensed sexual tension from the tightly wound Smith, who refused all drinks, smokes... and men? The lady dost protest to much, as Emanuelle very nearly got Diana to eat a ecstasy cookie with her feminine wiles. When Emanuelle pegged Smith as a lesbian virgin, it earned her a backhand with a slap follow-up. Slightly pissed, Emanuelle forced Diana to the ground, tearing at her clothes with her hands. After ripping off Diana's panties, Emanuelle forced Smith to drink alcohol, then initiated her in the Sapphic delights. Leaving Smith writhing on the floor, Emanuelle took Diana's clothes and claimed she was going to get the roll. Instead, she snuck out to the car of the overly-friendly driver who had first brought her to the "Singles Club." Emanuelle even bargained for airfare and a new dress, courtesy of gratitude sex...

...to be continued...

"The Sand Pebbles" Cast and Crew on Marayat Andriane

In commentary, the actor Mako said of Marayat, "she was much of a, you might say, loner really. Plus, she and I were staying at different hotels."

Director Robert Wise simply said, "Isn't she marvelous?" He then began laughing to himself for seven uneasy seconds, followed by another gulped chuckle.

Candice Bergen elaborated more fully: "Marayat; who was married to the French head of 'Ceto,' or something; she lived in Bangkok, and I remember that when I left, I visited her there and-- and had a lovely dinner with her, and she was quite exotic. Very beautiful, and, um, very educated, and fairly mysterious, but-- but lovely."

Sir Richard Attenborough continued: "The actress who I played opposite, I don't think, was an enormously experienced young actress... On the other hand, she had a wonderful truth about her. There was a wonderful sympathy. There was a wonderful simpleness-- uh, uh-- about the character. You didn't feel she was world wise a'tall... She was enchanting, I might say. Absolutely delightful, and very gracious to me, as being the 'professional actor,' as it were. I found myself very fond of her by the end of the movie."

Emanuelle in America (Part 4, 1976)

Character Name:
Actress: Laura Gemser
Actual Movie Title: Emanuelle in America
Known Aliases: "Brutal Nights," "Black Emanuelle en Amérique"
Country of Origin: Italy
Character Nationality: U.S.A.
Character Age:
Occupation: Photographer (news, nudes)
Zodiac Sign: Gemini
Religion:
Married:
Locales: New York
Release Date: January 5, 1977 (Italy)
Director: Joe D'Amato
DVD: Emanuelle In America (1976)
Stats: Third Black Emanuelle, 2nd with Laura Gemser

Story: Emanuelle attends a swank soiree, where she blows off a boorish fellow trying to make time with her. She then runs into a fresh general, who she also dismisses. She's more interested in the ridiculous bleach blond with the porn 'stace; Beastie Boys "Sabotage" by way of John Holmes in a white polyester leisure suit. A homely middle aged woman butts in, "You get your own drink." It seems Gregor, who wore a black and gold choker with a "5" engraved on it, had been "won." The woman would only allow Emanuelle to look at him from a distance she guided her to. "In the Caribbean Islands there's this delightful club for single women. It's quite extraordinary."

While Alfredo Elvize, Duke of Mount Elba (Gabriele Tinti) and his wife Laura (Paola Senatore) greet their guests, sneaks off to a secluded room... filled with fine art forgeries. The Duke grabs her arm from behind and growls "I don't like people who are too inquisitive." Alfredo had informers who had told him all about Emanuelle, and he thought she had a miniature camera secreted in her bracelet. Emanuelle confessed, showed him her bracelet was not so encumbered, and explained she wasn't there for work. "...Those forgeries don't interest me professionally. If you put one over on van Darren, I'll find that amusing." Alfredo still isn't sure he can trust her, but Emanuelle calmly explains "You can kill me if you like... Half of New York knows I'm here. Do you think it's worth it?" Alfredo relents, explaining he likes to collect paintings, and half of the ones in the room were genuine. As for customs, "a noble title has its advantages." Emanuelle thought his collection was perfect, "something like your marriage." Emanuelle was grateful for the help in confirming her doubts about matrimony. "I might even have changed my mind."

The Duke led Emanuelle back to the party, as his wife announced to all it was time to make the affair more interesting. A cake standing a good six feet was brought in, and everyone supplied a slice. An older, nerdy man finds the golden peanut in his piece, and is awarded another nubile piece hidden within the cake's frame. Nude, on a leash, and covered in frosting, the girl is led about-- and soon attracts other onlickers. Meanwhile the aggressive general is again rebuffed by Emanuelle, her eyes rolling, while the party converts to an orgy. As it turns out, Emanuelle's miniature camera was hidden in her necklace, and she finds the hardcore inserts of fellatio for European distribution far more interesting than the art scam. Don't we all? Alfredo and Laura bump uglies on the floor, along with everyone else. A lesbian couple sixty-nine, and Emanuelle doesn't even stop snapping when the general strips and suckles her. All the while, Nico Fidenco synths anticipate Goblin's score for "Dawn of the Dead."

After the gondola ride to the airport, Emanuelle strokes the cheek of her anonymous steward and tells him sardonically "You're the cleanest, sweetest memory I have of Venice." Clearly regretful, Emanuelle is ready to go back home...

...to be continued...

Emanuelle in America (Part 3, 1976)

Character Name:
Actress: Laura Gemser
Actual Movie Title: Emanuelle in America
Known Aliases: "Brutal Nights," "Black Emanuelle en Amérique"
Country of Origin: Italy
Character Nationality: U.S.A.
Character Age:
Occupation: Photographer (news, nudes)
Zodiac Sign: Gemini
Religion:
Married:
Locales: New York
Release Date: January 5, 1977 (Italy)
Director: Joe D'Amato
DVD: Emanuelle In America (1976)
Stats: Third Black Emanuelle, 2nd with Laura Gemser

Story: Emanuelle takes in a sauna (fully nude, 'natch,) and is joined by Gemini (Lorraine De Selle,) who confesses that Eric van Darren hasn't given her the medallion that signals a zodiac girl being his bedmate for the night in two months. Gemini once "answered him back," and is being punished by being sexually teased without authorized release. She refuses to leave, "And go where? To go back to Spain to my father's dirty restaurant? Gemini is obsessed with the boss and her pampered life, and can't stand the thought of those grabby truckers back home. Emanuelle likes the occasional trucker herself, but will have none of van Darren's conditioning. "Will you stop it!" Emanuelle demands while shaking Gemini, who protests "You think you're different!" Emanuelle smugly replies, "I certainly do. I like choosing my men, and never for money." Gemini breaks down, desperate for some kind of love, and Emanuelle gives it to her in spades. Cue '70s porn funk music, bad jump cuts, and glistening bodies making out.

Emanuelle receives the medallion, and plays up her enthusiasm in van Darren's bedroom... only to turn a factious offer to flog her into a scathing lecture of the poor little rich boy. "Shut up, stupid bitch!" Emanuelle continues about how she thinks women terrify van Darren, and how he has to pay for everything he gets. Eric van Darren begins to like this provocative game, but only to a point, as the boss clutches Emanuelle by the nape of the neck. "It's going to be fun for me to tame you; a new diversion." Tubby van Darren gets to feed her his chubby, blessedly off-screen.

The cut to a game of pool offers a symbolic transition to rival Alan Moore's "Watchmen," or at least Benny Hill's "The Benny Hill Show." Emanuelle is in the game room with the rest of the zodiac, fully clothed for once, and hoping to join Eric van Darren and Duke Alfredo Elvize high stakes game of backgammon. No wait, poker dice? James Bond wept! Why not Yahtzee, fer chrissakes? Emanuelle rolls a Full House, a Straight, Four Aces, and most especially van Darren, who still insists he never loses. Well, when the Duke rolls out in his crappy sedan the next morning, we see Emanuelle has stowed away in the back seat, after claiming to be headed for bed. Emanuelle had used her winnings to buy her freedom, and asked "Would you please let me off at the first bus stop?"

Alfredo Elvize, Duke of Mount Elba has something in common with the Emanuelle: a desire to screw van Darren. Maybe that's why he only freaks a little about his extra passenger. The Duke with a 400 year old lineage of Venetian nobility soon offers to take Emanuelle to his golden palace on the grand canal, and she smells a story.

Meanwhile, Emanuelle's boyfriend Bill is at his apartment when he finds out over the phone from his newspaper editor that his piece on illegal arms trading is being sidelined in favor of the more sensational harem story. "You mean to say that my political pieces can't be used? ...She's a monster, but she's my girl and I love her. Can't wait to have her back in my arms again... Where is she now?" Following that lead to Venice, Bill 'ol boy...

At the Duke's digs, Emanuelle meets his wife, Laura Elvize (Paola Senatore.) Laura seems to like her husband's new friend, though Mrs. Elvize's heralding of matrimony falls on deaf ears. Bill is still on his way, however. "We have a very special relationship. We're very free, both of us."

Later that night, Alfredo and Laura have a shouting match behind closed doors after the wife is caught in bed with another man. The scene attracts Emanuelle's attention, and she's invited into the drama with a champagne. Laura excuses herself to take a bath, while the Duke sets about seducing Emanuelle with the mouth whoopee. Laura returns to sneak in as an oral pinch licker, which at first seems to unnerve Emanuelle, but not for long. Emanuelle revs up the couple, but stealthily departs before things get too serious; her unique form of marriage councilling.

Emanuelle meets Bill at the airport, who confesses that while he missed his best girl, he did "console" himself in her absence. Bill excuses himself to make a phone call, but instead books the first flight to London. Emanuelle is pissed that Bill couldn't arrange to stay a few, or even one day. "But no, just a couple of hours between one plane and the other." Bill has his own work to pursue, but earmarked a sexual pit stop. The giddy couple, anxious for available space, find themselves in a standing fuck outside a symphonic practice hall, to classical accompaniment. Bill's headed back to his away plane before the other performance is through...

...to be continued...

Emanuelle in America (Part 2, 1976)

Character Name:
Actress: Laura Gemser
Actual Movie Title: Emanuelle in America
Known Aliases: "Brutal Nights," "Black Emanuelle en Amérique"
Country of Origin: Italy
Character Nationality: U.S.A.
Character Age:
Occupation: Photographer (news, nudes)
Zodiac Sign: Gemini
Religion:
Married:
Locales: New York
Release Date: January 5, 1977 (Italy)
Director: Joe D'Amato
DVD: Emanuelle In America (1976)
Stats: Third Black Emanuelle, 2nd with Laura Gemser

Story: Emanuelle meets with Joe(Efrem Appel,) who's coaching a pair of boxers sparring at his gym. "Hey baby-- better get you outta here. You're distracting the boys." Walking the streets outside, Joe explained his boxing career of "Eighty-seven knock-outs in eighty-eight fights" was cut short by politics and Eric van Darren (Lars Bloch.) The champion had buckshot in his gloves, but rich "crackerbox" van Darren saw to it a blind eye was turned. Joe had told Emanuelle all about it before, so she groaned and asked for the hot lead he'd promised. Joe had learned from his friend Charlie (Salvatore Baccaro) that van Darren was setting up his own private harem of a dozen women identified only by their zodiac sign. "Now I happen to know he has a vacancy for a Virgo."
"But I'm a Gemini."
"Just leave it to me. I can do things to your passport that you wouldn't believe, baby!"

Later, a white sedan drove Emanuelle to van Darren's estate, where she was met by the suspicious Charlie, who shows her to her room. Charlie explains that van Darren chooses how his girls dress. Seeing as none of the selections leave much to the imagination anyway, Emanuelle unashamedly strips out of the clothes she arrived in for a bath. "Oh, Joe didn't tell me you were so cold. I thought we'd be friends." She giggles as he exits. Later, Charlie gives Emanuelle a bracelet with van Darren's initials on it that must be worn at all times. Emanuelle works her magic on the uptight Charlie, until he tosses her on the bed for a romp.

Emanuelle hides a miniature camera in her bracelet, then walks the grounds. She bypasses his row of cars to take snaps of his two private jets. In the stables, a crate marked for horse shoes houses assault rifles, which are photographed. Emanuelle hears Charlie coming, and plays innocent as he escorts her out of these restricted areas. Back to being a stiff, Charlie explains that the girls are meant to do as they're told and remain available at the boss' discretion. Emanuelle meets her fellows, and learns the last Virgo was an Italian let go when she refused to drop fifteen pounds. "So he paid her off and sent her home." Though uncredited, Koike Mahoco from Orient Reportage and Black Cobra appears to be one of the zodiac. In the background Pedro the horse whinnies, as a certain little bitch is at it again, as the boss likes it...

Emanuelle goes swimming in the pool, which of course means it's time for a pale imitation of the same set-up from the original Emmanuelle... except with an extra girl and more crotch rubbing. Afterward, while sunning on the lawn, the boss hovers at Emanuelle's side. Creepy Eric van Darren thought "good old Joe" had made a nice choice for him. "We'll get acquainted later." The boss first had to meet with his dear duke. "You're the only guest I've had who hasn't taken advantage of the facilities, yet you're one of the most refined persons I know. What is it that isn't to your taste?" Alfredo Elvize, Duke of Mount Elba (Gabriele Tinti,) is still governed by traditional sentimentality it seems. van Darren sees the pursuit of proper women as wasted energy that could be better used for acquiring power. His harem allows van Darren to indulge whatever taste he has at a given time, effortlessly.

For instance, van Darren takes the Duke and his other girls to the stables, where a member of the zodiac with a taste for bestiality undresses and actually jerks off Pedro the horse on camera (both Emanuelle's and the picture director's. The canned sound effects are hysterical.)

...To Be Continued...

Emanuelle Bianca e Nera Videos

I'm too tired and pressed for time to pick up on "Emanuelle In America" this week, so here's some Italian videos from YouTube for a plantation-set knock-off of the series. We'll say it's part of Black History month, okay?

Emanuelle Bianca e Nera episodio1


Emanuelle Bianca e Nera episodio2 "Il Triangolo no!"


Emanuelle Bianca e Nera episodio3 "Amore Disperato"


Emanuelle Bianca e Nera Bonus track & Credits

Emanuelle in America (Part 1, 1977)

Character Name: Emanuelle Rogers
Actress: Laura Gemser
Actual Movie Title: Emanuelle in America
Known Aliases: "Brutal Nights," "Black Emanuelle en Amérique"
Country of Origin: Italy
Character Nationality: U.S.A.
Occupation: Photographer (news, nudes)
Zodiac Sign: Gemini
Married: No.
Locales: New York City, Venice, Washington D.C., Caribbean
Release Date: January 5, 1977 (Italy)
Director: Joe D'Amato
DVD: Emanuelle In America (1976)
Stats: Third Black Emanuelle, 2nd with Laura Gemser

Story: In a montage, Emanuelle rode the Roosevelt Island sky tram, walked the streets of Manhattan, bought a newspaper (her own?,) drove across a city bridge, and was solicited by an umbrella hat salesman. She did this all in a white suit, by the way. The montage was intercut with scenes from her destination: a photo shoot involving three female nude models, a dandy dressed male named Howie, and a motorcycle. Howie was first to exit as the girls dressed, while Emanuelle complimented Janet (Stefania Nocilli) on her weight loss. Janet complained to Emanuelle that her new intellectual boyfriend Tony (Giulio Bianchi) refused her sex. Emanuelle assured Janet that she had the right equipment to change his mind, then departed from the artistically sexed-up studio.

Driving off in her blue sedan, Emanuelle has a gun put to her head by a man in the back seat. She at first assumes this to be a robbery, and tries to hand over her money. When refused, Emanuelle offers her car, but the man declares he wants only to strangle her. Emanuelle pulls over onto a side street, unsure why she's been targeted, as her assailant hops into the passenger seat. The man begins preaching about the loss of values and ideals in the streets. "By killing you, I'll give the world a lesson in morality." Emanuelle deduces that this is Tony, who blames Emanuelle for damning his angelic Janet with her nude photography. "You are evil! You stimulate the basest, most inhuman instincts in people! Sex! Shame! Hell and damnation!" Emanuelle begins to seduce Tony, explaining that an executioner should know his victim, as well as guilting him with her friendship to Janet. Tony admits that he's a virgin who was scarred as a child by seeing his mother. While Tony rants about redeeming and marrying Janet, Emanuelle began making plays for Tony's zipper...

"You're right. Sometimes sex is shameful-- corruption, prostitution-- but not always. When it happens naturally, freely, then it's a vital force. It's happiness... it's cleanliness... it's love, even if it lasts only a moment." Speaking of which, the blowjob that follows is brief and anticlimactic. A panicked Tony drops his loaded automatic pistol and runs from the car, though he realizes "I love it!" Emanuelle giggles as she closes her passenger door.

After a shower, Emanuelle discusses the matter with Bill (Riccardo Salvino) as he mock aims the piece away from her. "You can have it... go to the police with it-- do whatever you want! Gee, what a scare that was." Emanuelle chooses not to report Tony, as she was still in one piece, concerned about hurting Janet, and hopeful she had helped Tony. Bill pours drinks from his cigarette-pack-shaped bar, hoping to "celebrate" with Emanuelle in their remaining fifteen minutes together. This couple knew each other well, as a photo of them together hung on the wall, though they "never get to see each other, because their jobs get in the way. Bill darling, we've been repeating the same things for so many years." Bill threatens to marry Emanuelle one day, but she protests that it would be a crime against freedom, "which is a must for both of us." Bill jokes about shooting himself, so Emanuelle finally submits to the sexin'. "...Who needs a dead lover?" She calls to tell Joe (Efrem Appel) she'll be tied-up until 8 o'clock...

...To Be Continued...

"Emanuelle Nera (Black Emanuelle)" by Bulldog

Here's the title music from the 1975 Emanuelle Nera soundtrack, performed by Bulldog, and composed by Nico Fidenco.

Marayat Andriane Black & White Head Shot

Another picture of "The Real Emmanuelle," taken from The Sand Pebbles (Two-Disc Special Edition).

Emanuelle and the White Slave Trade (1978) Conclusion: The Girls of Madame Claude

Character Name: Emanuelle
Actress: Laura Gemser
Actual Movie Title: "La Via Della Prostituzione"
Known Aliases: "Emanuelle and the Girls of Madame Claude"; "Black Emanuelle in Afrika"; "Emanuelle and the White Slave Trade"
Country of Origin: Italy
Character Nationality: United States
Occupation: Photojournalist
Zodiac Sign: Gemini
Locales: Nairobi, San Diego
Release Date: April 20, 1978 (Italy)
Director: Joe D'Amato
DVD: Black Emanuelle's Box, Vol. 2 (1976-1978)
Stats: Seventh Black Emanuelle

Story: While touring a market, Emanuelle spots the girl from the airport, now on her feet, being drug around by the man who seemed to buy her. Rivetti believes he's American, and in the white slave trade. Emanuelle, Susan and Rivetti have an irritatingly choppy three-way, filled with time lapses and black screens. On the way to the airport, Susan tells Emanuelle she learned the name of the slaver, Francis Harley (Gabriele Tinti.) They say their goodbyes, as Emanuelle returns to New York, and Susan to her mechanic.

At her newspaper offices, Emanuelle asks Walter about Harley, and is directed to a fashion photographer friend of hers, Jim Bonds (Bryan Rostron.) Jim in turn directs her to Eva Treddle, a model who fell for Harley, and a hostess at "Sailor's." Eva was out of contact, but directed Emanuelle to Ray Hamilton, a jockey that gives Harley betting tips. A few bribes later, she had access to a teenage white slave auction (virgins a valued premium,) where she snapped pictures with her lighter. She met with Jim Bonds again to relate her finds and intention to infiltrate the prostitution ring. Emanuelle begins crossing Francis Harley's path until he invites her to work a private club in San Diego. Before she leaves, Emanuelle hooks up with Jim in his dark room.

In San Diego, Emanuelle meets Madame Claude (Gota Gobert,) who explains that if she's discreet, Emanuelle will amass a small fortune within two years. If not, a powerful organization will close her mouth forever. Emanuelle stores a full-sized camera in her room, asks too many questions of the wrong people, and wanders where she knows it's prohibited. Her first client is too timid to initiate sex with women, so Emanuelle gives the Senator (Tom Felleghy) an intimate massage. Madame Claude watches behind a two-way mirror while fondling a young girl and herself. Emanuelle is later visited by Stephen (Nicola D'Eramo,) Madame Claude's transvestite confidant. The encounter with the senator was such a success, Stephen wanted to test Emanuelle's abilities on himself. She replied, "There are things that leave me cold," but she manages to sleep with him anyway, smiling the whole time.

Emanuelle trails Madame Claude to a forbidden adjunct, where she finds Claude and clients having sex with underage girls (just make believe, folks!) Emanuelle took lighter shots (I'd have said "flicked her Bic," but the assumed euphemism was not in effect under these circumstances.) "Sixteen-year-old" Midget, who tried to escape the compound, was later reported to have "fallen" to her death down a flight of stairs. For some reason, Emanuelle switched to the full-size camera once she snuck into Madame Claude's office to photograph documents. She's caught by Stephen, but talks the transvestite into helping her escape in exchange for an alibi when the police inevitably come knocking. Stephen agrees, but when the pair try to hide out at a bowling alley, Madame sends a gang after them. Stephen fends them off for a good while, but is beaten to death with a bowling pin, and Emanuelle is gang raped.

Madame Claude believes Emanuelle knows too much, so she'd drugged and committed. Dr. Rhine claims "Now days, a lobotomy can do miracles on patients like her. She won't remember a thing, and she'll live happily in complete oblivion." Others had been "lost" during the procedure, but the feeling is it would be best to keep the journalist alive through improved methods. "We'll operate on her tomorrow morning."
A lesbianic nurse complicit in these actions began to molest the bound Emanuelle in her hospital bed. "It's the first time I've done it with a woman. I rather like it, but wouldn't it be possible to give me something to relax me a little bit. I feel so tensed up." Emanuelle talked herself out of her bonds, then managed to drug the nurse after some obligatory caressing. Emanuelle actually wrestles with the nurse and wins-- no mean feat when you weight 65 lbs. and get raped every other movie.

Emanuelle tricked some of Madame Claude's "orderlies" into thinking she escaped out the window, but instead snuck through the hospital in the nurse's uniform. She hid in a laundry basket, and escaped in the service van. Somewhere along the way, she scored some shoes, and made her way to a fishing boat. Emanuelle called in her story to her editor, Mr. Hardy, who contacted the police. She also planned another date with Jim Barnes. Emanuelle finally had to willingly pay the ship crew for the trip from San Diego to Los Angeles with her body. "...My next article is on Sweden..."

Notes: Gota Gobert, who played Madame Claude, had a cameo in "Emanuelle in America."

Summation: Black Emanuelle movies have a story the way Uwe Boll flicks have direction-- in only the strictest sense of the term. Actually, co-writer/director Joe D'Amato was very much a Uwe Boll of his time, so that makes its own sense.

Trivia: "Kentucky Fried Movie" appears on a marquee.

Emanuelle and the White Slave Trade (1978) Part 1: Black Emanuelle in Afrika

Character Name: Emanuelle
Actress: Laura Gemser
Actual Movie Title: "La Via Della Prostituzione"
Known Aliases: "Emanuelle and the Girls of Madame Claude"; "Black Emanuelle in Afrika"; "Emanuelle and the White Slave Trade"
Country of Origin: Italy
Character Nationality: United States
Occupation: Photojournalist
Zodiac Sign: Gemini
Locales: Nairobi, San Diego
Release Date: April 20, 1978 (Italy)
Director: Joe D'Amato
DVD: Black Emanuelle's Box, Vol. 2 (1976-1978)
Stats: Seventh Black Emanuelle

Story: In Nairobi, Emanuelle met with British stewardess Susan Towers (Ely Galleani,) a friend from their modeling days. Susan tried to arrange a meeting between the photojournalist and Giorgio Rivetti (Venantino Venantini.) Emanuelle explained, "He's a gangster on an international level, and he went bankrupt in Italy. And then he slipped through the net, taking an immense amount of money with him. And now he's found a refuge here, where there's no extradition. And so he continues his business activities, honored and respected. So you'll see, it'll be quite a coup for me to interview him." An English reporter attempted to snap his picture previously, and ended up in hospital, so there was nothing doing. Emanuelle took some unauthorized shots of Rivetti's modest villa before being run off. She then joined Susan for a trip to the auto mechanic, where Emanuelle masturbated while Susan got down to dirty business in the pit under her Range Rover (a routine of hers.)

At the airport, Emanuelle spotted a young girl in a wheelchair being pushed by a man to a counter. Another man (Gabriele Tinti) arrived with a briefcase, which the first man took, as the second wheeled off with the girl. Authorities swooped in to take the first man into custody. Susan then returned with the idea that Emanuelle should pose with her as an air hostess greeting the just arrived Prince Arausani (Pierre Marfurt.) "Kenya Airways wish to welcome you, and hope that that you'll have a pleasant stay here. We've been put at your disposal." The trio tour the city, go for a swim, and have their cover blown by the Prince's secretary. "To be honest, I'll present you to Rivetti, but in your true colors. Take it or leave it."

Rivetti was displeased by the presence of the women, but accepted them into his villa as guests at the prince's insistence. Rivetti demanded that no pictures be taken of him, so of course Emanuelle had a ridiculous Bond gadget to break the agreement: a Zippo camera that snapped a picture each time she flipped the lid (lens optional.) Cue sapphic shower scene between Emanuelle and Susan as the pair settle in.

When Rivetti and the Prince come to loggerheads over a business matter, Rivetti suggests a safari at a national park. Joe D'Amato will be your director through a tour of African wildlife, as well as hot air ballooning, in yet another episode of Naked National Geographic Explorer. The group land in a native village, where Rivetti agrees to an interview, if Emanuelle can influence the Prince to his liking. In a rapidly cross-cut scene, Susan sleeps with Rivetti while Emanuelle beds the prince, often mirroring positions, as the tribesmen dance and sing. Contracts are signed, and the Prince is on his merry way.

While touring a market, Emanuelle spots the girl from the airport, now on her feet, being drug around by the man who seemed to buy her. Rivetti believes he's American, and in the white slave trade. Emanuelle, Susan and Rivetti have an irritatingly choppy three-way, filled with time lapses and black screens. On the way to the airport, Susan tells Emanuelle she learned the name of the slaver, Francis Harley. They say their goodbyes, as Emanuelle returns to New York, and Susan to her mechanic...

Laura Gemser Interview Excerpts from "A Hard Look" (2000)

Laura Gemser giving an interview

"This interview is a small part of the documentary "A Hard Look" by the British film director, journalist and actor Alex Cox. It was first released in 2000. It focuses on the making and the social effects the Emmanuelle / Black Emanuelle movies had and maybe still have today."

"It seemed like a long-- one long, long movie that didn't end. You know, it was always... the same story, the same things happens and... uhm... I'm... I think it's just one, one, one, one, one big movie...

When my first Emanuelle came out, there was this big poster, with me on it, and I was naked 'til here... and it was one day out, and they censored it. Censored-- can you say that? They took it off, and so people are curious to see it, because, you know-- it was-- and it's only twenty years ago... or maybe? So nowadays, you see-- everywhere, you see-- I mean, even in TV you see everything. You see-- I mean, in those days it was... rather... rather... How do you say it? Uh, scandaloso...

I know Francis Giacobetti because I made-- made pictures with him. Fashion pictures. And... he ask me if I do small, little, small role in his movie...

...You get used to it. I mean, it's hard to--to make love with the women. I mean, it's-- it's really hard. But, you know, you get paid for it, so you do it. You just... do it.

...I didn't really read the script, but they told me you were doing it-- I was doing it in Kenya, so I said yes... That's the only... idea-- to go to Kenya, and that for me was okay. I don't care about the script...

I will say I was... a journalist... a photographer... and they always sended me out to... to find some criminals... to get some drug criminals. There was a lot of drugs, right? And then.. there was always the same situation... always had to get myself undressed to get something... I don't know...

Any excuse is good to get-- get naked. I saw the one-- the first Emanuelle, because I was curious. But then... but then I felt baaad, because... I didn't expect to see... I refused a lot of scenes. They put in stand-in, and I didn't know. So... when I saw the movie... I really don't-- I rather felt bad... There was a scene... in a train. I think it was... she was making love with a whole... football team... or, I don't know. I don't remember. But, I refused that scene, and they used stand-ins, and-- I don't know what are the scenes... I forgot. Really, I forgot...

...A little bit tired of doing this, and I was trying to do some other kind of movies. But... I had that label on me, and it's very hard to get out of it. So I said 'I hate it,' so I stopped doing it."